


The Social Dynamics of Aomine

by the_crazyones



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Gen, Humor, Male-Female Friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-21
Updated: 2014-03-21
Packaged: 2018-01-16 11:32:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1345918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_crazyones/pseuds/the_crazyones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Momoi tries to widen Aomine's social circle.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Social Dynamics of Aomine

Aomine was lazily reading his Mai-chan magazines minding his own business when he was suddenly besieged by Momoi's cheerfulness. Not that this was a strange occurrence - it happened to him on a daily basis.

"Dai-chan~! I heard that there is a special event for White Day happening in Akihabara! Aand...couples can get a 50% discount from the food vendors!" Momoi squealed excitedly into his ear.

Pushing her face away with one hand, Aomine rubbed his ear with a scowl, and then the contents of her high-pitched squeal registered in his mind.

"What, seriously? Half off? Okay, that settles it, let's go!" Aomine said excitedly. Momoi smiled at his excitement, she was very glad that he was coming out of his apathetic shell ever since that loss against Tetsu-kun...

"-wait, both of us? No! No way! I'm going with Tetsu-kun! I've already reserved his company even though it's two weeks from now!" Momoi told him indignantly.

That brought back Aomine's scowl. "Tetsu can barely eat anything other than vanilla shakes anyway! That discount is wasted on him." Aomine turned away from her in a huff.

Momoi pouted. "Ah, Dai-chan, with him it's not about the food, it's about the company. I only told you about this because I thought it'd be a fun outing with all of us together, and you'd be able to enjoy eating your way through the festival. Don't you have any female friends you could ask...no, wait, you really don't!"

At this realisation, Momoi gasped and brought her hands to her mouth. How could she not have noticed that the only girl he ever hung around with was her? Maybe it was because she spent all her energy trying to look after his absolute basic needs like trying to get him to _wake up_ and _go to school_ , she forgot to consider his higher needs, like having a diverse social circle.

Aomine was grumpily flipping through the magazine once more when Momoi declared, "Alright! Dai-chan, I've decided! I will help you make a female friend to go with you to this event!"

This statement caused Aomine to turn around to face her so quickly he nearly cricked his neck. "What the hell, Satsuki! I'm not some five-year-old that needs you to help me make friends. Leave me alone! I...uh, don't want to go to this stupid event anymore."

Momoi shook her head sadly. "This isn't just for the event anymore, Dai-chan. This is for your own good." And despite Aomine's continuing protestations, Momoi whipped out her mobile phone and looked through her contacts.

"Hmm, let's see...who would be suitable to help us in this quest..." Momoi hummed, while Aomine groaned and put his face into his hands. "It shouldn't just be some random girl, of course, there has to be some sort of connection or else you would never be able to have a quality friendship with her...Ah! Ki-chan might know some girls!" She pressed the speed-dial button enthusiastically.

After just a single ring, Kise picked up. "Momoicchi~! How are you~? I'm doing so well, just the other day I-"

"Ki-chan. I don't have time for chitchat now. I need you to tell me if you know anyone that can form a beautiful friendship with Dai-chan in 14 days! Right now! It's an emergency. We have to save Dai-chan's pathetic social life." Momoi ordered Kise, cutting off his bubbly greeting.

"Oi!" Aomine protested.

"Whaat? Aominecchi's in danger of only revolving his life around basketball and other basketball freaks, without ever experiencing the true joy of bonding with different sorts of people, and more importantly... _girls_?" Kise shrieked into the phone.

Momoi nodded firmly. "Exactly."

"Oi!" Aomine protested angrily. "I'm right here!" Even though Kise wasn't on loudspeaker, the sheer shrillness of the blond ensured that he more than clearly heard every word.

"That's awful! Okay, I'll help you, Momoicchi! I'm looking through my contacts right now! I'm scrolling down the alphabets, Momoicchi! I'm scrolling! I'm scrolling!" Kise shouted enthusiastically. "Aaand...I don't think I can help you. Sorry."

"Whaat?!" Momoi gaped. "What happened to all that enthusiasm?"

"I'm sorry, Momoicchi, but all the girls on my contact list are my fangirls. As cute as they all are, I don't think they'd be interested in even being friends with Aominecchi," confessed Kise regretfully.

Aomine snorted (having picked up on Kise's shrill decibels once again). "The hell I'm gonna spend any time with _anyone_ who has the patience to even be in the same room as _Kise_."

As Kise cried, "That's mean, Aominecchi! I'll have you know, I'm an absolutely charming companion...", Momoi sighed and said, "You're right. You won't be helpful at all. Bye, Kise-kun." And ended the call as Kise wailed, "'Kise-kun'?! I'm downgraded now? Momoicch-"

Aomine grinned. "I guess that we can't do anything about this, so we should all just forget this happened-"

"Not so fast, Dai-chan." Momoi interjected firmly. "The problem with going to Ki-chan was that I failed to consider that all the girls he knew weren't interested in basketball. So we're now going to make you be friends with a girl who is actually into basketball." She sighed happily. "With basketball as the foundation, there's no way a wonderful, solid friendship can't be born!" And while Aomine groaned, "Oh, come on, just drop this already...", she quickly typed a number into her phone.

"Um...hello? Aida Riko-san? This is Momoi Satsuki, Touou's manager. Dai-chan wants to talk to you now!"

Momoi shoved the phone into Aomine's ear. He spluttered, "Wha-? Who the hell-?"

"Excuse me, brat?" Riko hissed as she heard his rather undignified babbling. Momoi mouthed, "Seirin's coach! Try to work your social skills now. Talk about her experience coaching Kagamin or something" at Aomine. And since they had known each other for so long, Aomine could understand every word she mouthed.

"Uh...hey. Yeah, I'm Aomine."

At her end, Riko nodded. "Okay."

"Um...so, Seirin, huh?" Aomine scratched the back of his neck. Momoi rubbed her temples, then mouthed "Kagamin, Kagamin!" at him.

Riko raised an eyebrow. "Yes. I'm at Seirin."

"Kagami's at Seirin too." Aomine tried taking Momoi's advice. "He plays basketball for Seirin." Momoi dropped her face into her hands.

"Yes, he does. You lost to him and Kuroko-kun recently." Riko was starting to get a headache. "What did you want to talk to me about, Aomine-kun? Or do you just want us to state facts at each other?"

Seeing Momoi's obvious frustration and second-hand embarrassment, Aomine tried to salvage the conversation somehow. "Yeah, I don't mind talking facts at each other. It's...er, quite nice isn't it? We're both basketballs...I mean, we both play basketball...I mean, we both have some connection to basketball, I play it, you coach it, although we're in different schools. You're at Seirin. I mean, of course you are, you just said it..."

It was too painful to listen to. Momoi quickly snatched the phone before Riko thought Touou's ace was insane. "I'm so sorry, Riko-san! Please forget this ever happened. Please continue as you were!" and she quickly hung up before Riko thought to question her further.

Momoi turned to Aomine, who was rubbing his neck and slightly shuffling his feet. "Have you even heard of a conversation?"

As Aomine frowned and opened his mouth to argue, Momoi held out a hand to cut him off. "Never mind! I'm at my wit's end. I'm going to ask Tetsu-kun for help now. He used to be your shadow after all." And before Aomine could protest the sheer embarrassment of getting the help of his old middle school best friend (and secretly, the boy he used to want to impress the most on the court), Momoi had speed-dialed Kuroko.

"Good morning, Momoi-san."

"Tetsu-kun~! I need your help! I don't know what to do about Dai-chan! His social circle just isn't-" Momoi began wailing, but Aomine grabbed the phone from her hand before she could continue.

"Ah, Tetsu? Sorry about this. There's nothing, no problem at all. See you for streetball next week."

Aomine clicked the phone shut and then glared at Momoi while holding it out of her reach. He looked at her until she pouted in frustration and stared right back at him.

"Okay, listen here, Satsuki. I don't know what your deal is with my social circle right now, but I feel like I gotta clear some things up. I think that my social circle is already pretty full of strange people...and seriously, that's enough already for me! Tetsu's invisible quite a lot, but he'll obviously be the first friend to appear when things go wrong. Kagami's...ack, okay, fine! He's _actually_ fun to play basketball with...and just to push around."

"Kise's really dumb...but he's the guy to go to if you want to be cheered up. Murasakibara's annoyingly childish, but he'll never let a friend down. And urgh, Akashi's terrible, but the guy's like Google or Amazon, you can get any sort of shit or information you need from him. And Midorima's clearly a freak. But he considers all of us the most. Just in _such_ an _annoying_ way! I mean, stop texting me about Oha Asa already!"

Aomine paused from his mini-rant on Midorima, took a deep breath, then glared at Momoi harder. He needed her to understand this.

"And...yes, I don't have any female friends."

Aomine exhaled.

"But I don't need any, because I already have you to nag me and shit, okay?" He frowned at her. "So just drop the damn subject already! Sheesh..."

Aomine deepened his scowl at Momoi, just for good measure. Then he flopped to the floor, and placed the previously abandoned Mai-chan magazine over his face.

Momoi had been gaping at Aomine's long, uncharacteristic speech (why couldn't he have talked this eloquently with Riko, dammit...) and as he continued, she had been making touched expressions, letting out tiny 'aww's and nodding vigorously at the Midorima part. But when it came to his short statements on her, she had basically froze. As Aomine dozed behind his magazine, she slowly thawed, then, gently slid the magazine off his face.

"Dai-chan, okay, I understand. Let's go to the White Day event together, alright?" She smiled kindly down at him.

"Hmph...if Tetsu's alright with it...and that's what I've been saying from the beginning! You're so annoying," Aomine huffed, and turned away from her to lie on his side and continue his nap.

Momoi only smiled knowingly, happy to keep to herself that the self-centred Dai-chan she had known since her last year at Teikou had matured ever so slightly after all.


End file.
